Every Image has a Back Story - BTI

I have been thinking about my childhood a lot lately. My life seems to be going forward, but my memories keep going deeper back in time. Some of the images I create are based on a certain memory which I cherish, and I want to document while I can. The Hamilton quote has been sung in my head quite a bit lately.

“How do you write like you’re running out of time? Write day and night like you’re running out of time? How do you write like tomorrow won’t arrive? How do you write like you need it to survive?” I seem to create images like I need it to survive.

I am in the planning stages of writing a series of AliZines which share the backstories to many of these photographs.

I picture my work, hanging in the small art gallery at the Hopkins Center at Dartmouth College. A future middle school teacher (named Jan), selects only a small group of her students, who are excelling in art class, to spend a morning at the gallery (which distinctly smells like clay).

The students are taught how to analyze the photographs in the showcase, and discuss the meanings of each image. At the end of the session, the art teacher presents each student with an AliZine of the images and my interpretation of each piece created. The students grow up with a love for art, and make the world a better place expressing themselves with their creativity, too.

Here are three in a series about my schooling. I created all three pieces during different years, not in sequence, and with no intention of them fitting together perfectly to represent Elementary School, Middle School, and High School.

This first piece is called “Baggage”.

It started with me finding the dress at the local Savers. I had flashbacks to this outfit as a 1976 Kindergarten student. I wanted to transform myself back into my childhood self. I needed the portrait at my Elementary School, The Bernice A. Ray School. That one story building with the 1970’s designed “Multipurpose Room” sunken auditorium, was part of who I am today.

I also wanted to include what was part the identity of an elementary school student from K - 4. (Fifth Graders were too cool for it) …The lunch box. Yes, I own a collection of lunchboxes. They had been waiting for this moment all of their lives to be in a portrait, I am sure.

I created this, not only as a nod to my 90% excellent childhood, but also due to that 10% of not so good memories. This 10% is the baggage one takes with them from these years forward into adulthood.

It confronts that 10% of memories which causes one to have to go to therapy at age 50. One small memory which may be the root of a adult’s character. Why they are who they are. A memory of being an outcast for one month in 4th grade by their best friends, or maybe flipping upside down on a bike rack and banging up their head, so to miss the school bus going home, in kindergarten, or perhaps wondering if their eating problem stems from winning the donut on the string eating contest at Halloween one year.

We take a lot of baggage with us from our childhood, and this is my way to express not only the wonderful memories of my school days, but also how the spark of just a few negative moments are engrained in our lives and unconsciously form us as adults.

This second piece is called “Mall Rats.”

I am completely obsessed with indoor malls. It brings me back to my middle school years when my sisters and I yearned to shop at malls. You would think we were heading to Disneyland. I even wrote about every item I bought at the Mall, including what I paid for them and what stores they came from.

The closest Mall to us was about an hour and a half away. It was always an adventure going there for the day and shopping our hearts out for new outfits, jewelry, records, and decorations for my room. Our cousins on both sides of my family lived within minutes of their Malls…within minutes! Lucky dogs! The best school breaks were when I was in middle school and my mom would drop us off to the cousins house for vacation, and on a few of those days, my aunts would drop the 5 cousins off at the mall for the day.

The sound and smell of an indoor fountain running, the mainstay of stores such as Kay-Bee Toys, Joann’s Nut House, Claires, Brookstone, Sam Goody, Mrs Fields, Orange Julius, Tape World, B Dalton, Radio Shack, Benetton, Kinney Shoes, Pet Stores galore, Kmart, Ames, Bradlees, Deb, Musicland, and of course, Spencer Gifts with the naughty black light section in the back were heaven to me.

I now live 10 minutes from a few malls in Southern California, but they are outdoor malls full of high end stores. BLAH. But, I did not realize until a few years ago that I have been living near an indoor mall that still has an orange julius in it! When I found it I was extatic! But…I also learned that it was going to be sold and torn apart. NOOO. I decided I must document this magic before it would be lost to local future generations of Mall Rats.

So, this image represents my awkward yet cool middle school years, the first times I was out in a group of my sisters and cousins without parents. I would check out the guys in the mall, and freak out if they ever looked back. No cell phones, no internet, no teenage credit cards, no kids shopping who looked like super models, and the only over priced-store I remember was Benetton.

Indoor Malls will never be the same again, and I was blessed to have had them when I was a teen. I love that this group of friends I created are all trying to be the “In-Crowd.” Cool, copycatting each other, and all going through their awkward early teens differently. Yet they stick together in their matching tees and living their life simply yet to the fullest they know how, as they hang at the Indoor Mall.

This last image is called “The Prom”.

Not Prom…I would love to know why kids these days dropped the THE.

I grew up at a very cool High School. We did not have bells between classes, we did not have study halls, we were able to sign out of campus during our breaks, we wanted to change the mascot to a sloth, and we yearned to hang in the Senior Lounge when we hit Senior Year.

Although truthfully…I sat in the Senior Lounge once, (on a bean bag or carpet covered block), when I first became a Senior. I looked around at the other seniors sitting on beanbags looking back at me, and my awkward self never went back. Instead I would sign out of school, walk over to my grandmother’s apartment across the street, drink instant coffee, eat gingersnaps, watch “Hazel” on tv, and play cards with my Gram.

I had the BEST High school years, and I did not realize this until I became an adult.

In this image, I wanted to capture this moment that was never part of my BEST memories. Another interesting fact about Hanover High School is that we never had homecoming or a Prom Queen or King. Did I miss out on worrying about not winning the most votes, or worrying about what if I did win the most votes, having pig blood dumped on me? (ok, another fact about growing up during the 80’s was that we all read Stephen King WAY too young and it shaped our generation awesomely!)

No, I did not miss not having a Prom at all.

I think watching the anguish of Molly Ringwald in so many John Hughes movies allowed me to vicariously live through her, and get that drama out of my system. Don’t get me wrong, I still had my own drama. For example that weekend, on a dare, I called up a Junior I had a crush on when I was a freshmen, and two hours later bumping into him at the Record Store, and then on Monday, having my older sister tell me she heard all about it directly from him.

So, this image of a perfect prom moment is one I created for myself. As a 48 year old woman, I found a BNWT Prom Dress (that is Brand New With Tags, if you are not hip like me), at the Listen Center in my hometown. I ordered a Prom Queen Sash and a crown off of Amazon, and I asked my creative Aunt Carolyn, during a visit, if she had any extra flowers and ribbon I could make into a wrist corsage, (of course presented to me from my record store crush in this storyline, ha!).

I drove by my high school, took some photos of the classic brick exterior, and Voila! With a little magic, my imaginary moment was made, in front of my High School! A dream I never needed or wanted came true. :)

There you have it, some BTI from three of my favorite Chameleon Shoots about three stages of life. It is a joy to share a bit more about my work and how I create my pieces.

Thank you for reading this post and learning more about my art. Feel free to comment on this feed or on the Facebook link, if you found the article that way. I appreciate your appreciation for my photography.